Understanding Faith

"The third is the gift of faith. We can believe in Him – for life, for love, and for the power to overcome. Power to overcome even death. This gift requires trust, and helps us get through every day, every circumstance, and every period of trouble. It is a gift that offers a holy hand to hold and a holy shoulder to cry on. A gift that holds the answers of hope and joy."

The quoted paragraph above is an excerpt from the Proverbs 31 devotions for December 17th, 2008 by Tracie Miles. Go to http://proverbs31devotions.blogspot.com to read the entire entry - it is based on John 3:16 -"For God so loved the world (us) that He gave His one and only begotten son (Jesus), so that whoever believes in Him may not perish but have everlasting life."

Where am I going with this??

I have received many comments and e-mails regarding my attitude in dealing with the trials life has dished out to us. I want to make sure everyone understands that I have my moments - and days - that are really ugly. I get angry. I cry. I doubt. It brings my heart joy to know that I can be an encouragement to others even in my humanness and that Jesus is using my circumstances to perhaps bring joy or peace or understanding to others. Do I wish I didn't have to go through this? Absolutely! But as I have learned from past sufferings we have endured - there are always rewards we would not have received had we gone down an easier road. Many times it is a new friend I cannot imagine living my life without. But all of it is a process and my ultimate goal is to lean on Christ. Much of the time I succeed, but we can never fully understand or wrap our brains around suffering and what we see as injustice. We can only cling to the Saviour and strive to be the child he desires us to be, but in the end it is only death that gives us the perfect, sinless life that HE originally intended.

My hope and prayer for you today is that you know Him. If you already have a relationship with Him, grow it. If you do not -ask for one. He is there ready and waiting to help you through all of your tough spots too. I know that I would probably have killed myself long ago if I didn't know that He was watching out for me and wanted the absolute best for me. He cries when I cry. He laughs when I laugh. He holds me up and promises to never leave me or forsake me. The best Best friend you can have. John 10:10 says, "The thief (Satan)comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I (Jesus)came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." Not so we can trudge through - but have an abundant, joy-filled life.

Joy and happiness are not the same. Joy is knowing that there is more to this life, no matter your circumstances. Happiness is a feeling dependent on circumstances. Since many of my circumstances are outside my scope of 'control' - I am going to choose joy =) Joy in the family and friends I have, joy in the weather - whether it is snow or rain or a sunny 70 degrees, joy in the Christmas lights, joy in giving the perfect gift at Christmas, joy at the picture my child draws just for me, joy in wearing party dresses over our jammies on an 'ice day', joy in an 'unconditional-love' hug from my 2-yr old. Joy. Find it. It is there - sometimes you have to just forget all the other 'crap' around you and live for that one moment. It helps to not eat you alive.


I hope you can truly celebrate the gift that is Jesus this Christmas season and accept the presents He has wrapped up - just for you.

Triann

A Moving Story - Literally - Part 2 (The Fires)

SO we left off with the wee hours of October 21st. The night before, the thick smoke from the fire in Ramona - a small town 15-20 miles from us -started rolling in. It was an eerie feeling, but everyone - friends, media, law enforcement - were telling us it was OK and that there was no way, at least not any time soon, that the fire would head our way. Well, Eric was part facinated and part concerned about the fires, so he stayed up ALL night Sunday night watching the fire coverage as it creeped closer and closer to our area. Finally they reported it was across the valley from us, but we still hadn't been ordered to evacuate. Eric called the hotline and asked about our zip code and they told us to stay put until we received our reverse 911 call alerting us to the fact that it was time to go. Well, the night before I had packed an overnight bag for all of us -a change of clothes, important medicine, laptops with our pictures, etc. Never in a million years would I have thought we would not return to our home! I would have stuffed the van all night to the gills! But I am getting ahead of myself... Around 4AM Eric had had enough and went to throw the few things I had gathered into the van and I had a feeling it was time to go so I went and got Emily, put her in her wheelchair and at that moment Eric ran back into the house and said 'we are leaving - NOW!' One of us grabbed Daniel from his crib and the other grabbed Emily and we raced to the car that he left running in front of our building. I never could have been prepared for what I experienced at that moment. Sheer panic - True fear for my life and that of my children. THe hills surrounding our apartment complex were up in flames - and I am talking WALLS of fire - something out of a movie - and the wind was so fierce it was blowing dense smoke and burning embers though the parking lot. It was too think to breathe as we raced to get the kids buckeld into their car seats and head out. We were in a community of houses, condos and the one apartment complex. Typically we had three gates available to come and go out of, but this morning there was only one. One gate was not working - perhaps because of electricity issues, the other gate had a burning tree across it! All of the people in the complex had to slowly file out of ONE gate! I seriously did not know if we would get out of the complex alive. I was terrified and I NEVER want to experience anything like that again. Being surrounded by fire and not knowing if you will burn alive in your car with your husband and your kids? No one needs to experience that in life - trust me. This probably sounds over dramatic, but Eric would agree with me and he is very level headed! =)
We obviously made it out alive, but it was a slow, fire filled drive to the red cross shelter. I could tell so many stories from our fire saga, but I will do that another time.
Now we were homeless (the apartment - amazingly - did not burn down, but the smoke and ash damage was so bad we were forced to move. Nearly everything in the garage was a total loss and our belongings went to be cleaned. It took over 2 months to get our clothing, bedding, and linens back from the fire restoration company because they were so overwhelmed with clients. Eric had just started back to work only to have work shut down for the week because of the fires and now we had to find a new place to live. Emily and I were both having trouble breathing because of the smoke we had inhaled that morning and the air quality was so bad we just couldn't quit the coughing, so the kids and I flew to Portland to stay with my family while Eric worked and searched for another place to live. He finally located, with the help of a realtor, a condo that would, for the most part, meet our needs - especially that of Emily's. After a month in the beautiful Northwest and 2 rounds of meds in order to combat the Pnuemonia Emily and I came down with, we flew back down to smogy - i mean, sunny - San Diego. What a tough fall!!